Leaving a marriage that’s been nothing but toxic is the first step to moving on. But if you don’t take measures to effectively deal with it, that animosity and ill will could continue right into your post-divorce life. No one wants that. If you want healthy emotional relationships in your life, you need to find ways to manage and deal with the conflict effectively. We list six ways:
Set the anger and hurt aside
It’s not going to be easy. But it’s going to be worth it. Try to distance yourself emotionally from your ex. If you have kids, expect them to be upset, hurt and angry, says Help Guide. It’ll get tough. You’ll have to stay focused. Think about your kids, about what’s best for them. That could be a good start.
Meditate and exercise
If the dissolution of your marriage has been a painful experience for you, you could end up depressed. And while being sad, expressing your feelings, venting, can all be good, if your mood still doesn’t pick up, it could affect your work, your relationships with other people. It could affect your kids. Exercises help. They don’t just keep you healthy, they also distract you so you won’t feel sad, hurt or angry anymore.
Respect and compromise
Always respect your ex as much as you can. Manners can go a long way to keeping your relationship on safe ground. Find a compromise that works both ways.
Look for a mediator
If the conflicts persist and hurt feelings won’t go away, ask a mediator for help. This might be a lawyer or any other third party who can help you and your ex-spouse settle things as amicably and peacefully as you can. These include any of your children’s medical and educational needs. Financial issues—budget, household accounts and more—should be tackled as well.